Sports & Wellness

Woman Recovering from ‘Mind-blowing’ Orgasm Pledges to Never Neglect Self-Care Again

Rachel McObitz
November 5, 2018

Just after 11am last Tuesday morning, Stacey Vanblatt, after experiencing a particularly powerful orgasm, made a pledge to never again neglect prioritizing her basic needs. After back-to-back work shifts over the weekend prior and the added stress of multiple assignments, Stacey proclaimed that her work-life balance would improve if she had the clarity and self-confidence of her post orgasm bliss more often.

“This morning I actually took a shower because I had a little extra time, and since my roommates were gone, I decided to have a little me time afterwards,” Stacey described with a forlorn look in her eye. She had decided through this experience that the importance of taking care of herself should never be on the back burner due to her day to day life stress. “Between trying to make sure I’m able to pay my rent and the takeout I order instead of buying groceries and producing at least passable work for my classes, I forgot that I too am a person with a body!”

Stacey, a fourth year student at Acadia, expressed her sadness over the closing of Wolfville’s only sex shop. “It’s a shame that Valley Vixen closed because I would definitely be up to spending $200 I don’t have to ensure I commit to more frequent experiences with myself.” Stacey said, although also conceding that on average, the likelihood of a recurrence of this experience would be in the next 5-6 months. “That’s all going to change now, though! Moving forward, I need to make myself a priority.”

Danielle, a classmate and friend, confirmed that Stacey was approaching her day with a renewed vigour. “She bounced into class all peppy and everything. It’s refreshing and empowering to see her so full of life again.”

Since Stacey had not found time to shower in several days, her hair and face appeared noticeably different and her demeanour and odour had a distinct shift. “I'm going to start actually using my planner and stick to a manageable schedule that includes time for me and things that are good for me. Maybe tomorrow I'll do laundry!” Stacey said optimistically.  In an obvious empowerment euphoria, Stacey contemplated signing up for a fitness class next semester promoted by Kellie Shillington through incessant all-student emails.

A week later, the Hatchet reached out to Stacey for further comment. “I mean, that all sounds great I guess, but who actually has time, you know?” She responded amidst scrolling her Instagram feed.

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